Down in Panola County

I tend to say all good things come from the South, and that includes me. Home is Mississippi. My family has deep roots in Panola County (literal translation = Cotton County), and that's where I learned all of the important things - walking, talking and dancing. It's also where I first discovered my love for books.

There's usually a negative or puzzled reaction when I mention I'm from Mississippi. Yes, the state is the only state that still has the Confederate flag as part of its state flag design, and its reputation for slow as molasses civil rights adoption and recognition is well-deserved.

Still, I'm part of the community, and it's a community where you make eye contact and greet everyone that passes. I was back in town last week to celebrate my grandmother's 85th birthday. As usual, I ate a whole lot including Big Mama's famous fried pies and caramel cake, and I visited Wal-Mart about 50-11 times.

On this trip, I also discovered LivLoveYoga, which is on the town square in Batesville. My sister and I made multiple trips and immediately felt welcomed by Liv and the center's regulars. We also made a trip to Oxford to visit a young fellow by the name of William Faulkner.

I wasn't expecting this to be a vacation, but I ended up refreshed and wasn't ready to return my routine.

My birthday girl who still goes to the gym at least twice per week and has the bones of a 17-year-old.

Mmmmm...my favorite peach pies. I only had 3.

Liv and Zeus, the owners of LivLoveYoga, are bringing health, wellness and an overall glow to the community.

Neither I nor my sister are dog people. Zeus didn't care.

Most of the fam. Those 14 and up tried to act right. The young ones just acted up.

I still love me a good book store. With signed releases from authors such as Roxane Gay AND a section dedicated to William Faulkner, Square Books is an Oxford landmark.

When you show up dressed exactly like the star of the book, you buy the book. About to dive into The Hate You Give by Angie Thomas, a writer based in Jackson. 

Me and my pal, William. He turned away after I mentioned the need for commas and periods in prose.

Cocktails, Conversations & Inspiration

For me, it's become increasingly harder to read the news. In the last couple of weeks, there's been the acquittal of Philando Castile's murderer, the stingy Senate health care plan, and continued attempts to silence media.  

That's why I need - absolutely have - to attend events like Cocktails & Conversations from the United State of Women. The United State of Women is focused on gender equality and creates opportunity through collaboration. Causes includes health and reproductive rights, access to education, economic empowerment and civic engagement and community organizing.

A bit of a fan girl moment for me. Right before the event began, I upgraded my view to VIP. I was literally right in front of the panel, and, thus, my perfect twist out Afro landed in a lot of shots.

Since this movement has deep roots in the previous administration, it's not surprising that Tina Tchen, former chief of staff for First Lady Michelle Obama, and Valerie Jarrett, former senior adviser to President Barack Obama, are two of the movement's biggest supporters. Both are remarkable, magnetic women who even in these trying times maintain a terrific sense of humor and dedication.

As Ms. Tchen noted, "We are living through the challenge of our generation," and, for me, that's absolutely true. Until November 8, 2016, I believed that we were past such blatant attempts to maintain unfair playing fields, and I thought that in our highest levels of government, we wanted intelligent officials to weigh policies with some - if not fully the best - interests of their constituents in mind.

Yet, I sit here in June 2017 wondering whether this era of retro policies will lead us right back to 1950. Both Ms. Tchen and Ms. Jarrett reiterated that now is not the time to be disillusioned, and our democracy is what we make it. Maybe the delay of the vote on the Senate health care plan is a sign of that. Just last week, Cecile Richards of Planned Parenthood noted that while a room of men crafted this disastrous bill, about 80 percent of the calls to Congress have been from women.

It may seem cliche, but we absolutely need our seats at the table. As Ms. Jarrett said last night, imagine how amazing Congress would be if it were half women. Notice she didn't say no men. It really is about equality. 

BlogHer17: On the 3rd Day, I Rested

Uh-huh. I listened to my body and dipped out of the conference and into the pool. However, a nice surprise was winning not just one, but two pair of glasses from Phonetic Computer Eyewear. Here are the glasses I chose. Can't wait to get them and my red Maryland sunglasses, too. Not so ironically, this is what I needed most from the expo. #blessed

BlogHer17: Best Moments of Day 2

Pictures are worth at least 350 words.  

Started the day with a riveting panel featuring Ana Navarro and Joy Reid.  

Loved that Serena continuously said "winning Wimbledon" when trying to say "winning women." Can't wait to see her back on the court. She was here to share the Purple Project, which focuses on the financial aspect of domestic abuse. 

This picture was cuter than expected, so it gets a post. 

Voice of the Year recipient Nia Evans speaks about the Let Girls Learn campaign.  

Closed out the night with an exclusive screening of Girls Trip. It was hilarious! 

BlogHer17: Scenes From Day 1

This week, I'm attending my second BlogHer conference. Like last year, I look forward to hearing from a variety of storytellers and being inspired by their passion and all around badassery.   

Mama-I-made-it-fun while waiting to register!

BlogHer17 has a special focus on health and wellness. Since the senate released its (lack of) health care plan today, it was especially important to hear from Chelsea Clinton and Cecile Richards of Planned Parenthood. Cecile says we can beat this. Let's hope she's right. Call your senators! 

After the rousing opening sessions, I ventured into the expo. FWIW, fresh squeezed OJ  & Bob Evans mashed potatoes are darn tasty. And taking photos ain't never old. P.S. I hear tomorrow's Girls Trip screening is first come, first served. 

New Year Resolution

I know. Kinda late to be writing about my New Years resolution, but it's still 2017, right? 

The obvious - I failed to update my blog for a few months. A bit of procrastination, and a bit of life filled with new and same ol' adventures including a new boyfriend. Seriously, I met him about two weeks before my last blog post, and I'm just getting back to here.

Last week, I attended my niece's fancy NYC high school graduation. I was hoping SOMEONE with a NAME would speak and maybe I'd get a cool selfie or story to tell. Well, we got a YouTube star, and she brought a message I needed to hear. Michelle Poler is known for 100 Days Without Fear, a project in which she did 100 terrifying things in 100 days. This project inspired her to create Hello Fears, which chronicles "stories of courage from everyday people." Michelle is now a global speaker who has appeared on a range of stages from TEDx to Facebook.

A few of Michelle's fear-related points resonated with me:

• Fear is limited.
• You can step forward into growth or backwards into safety.
• Every time you choose a comfortable path you're moving backward.
• Instead of concentrating on "what's the worst that could happen," think about "what's the best that could happen."

These pieces of advice are...practical, so last weekend, I faced one of my own fears. All right, all right. Kayaking isn't exactly scary, but it's scary when you're a person who wants to limit vulnerability, and you know that semester of swim lessons in college didn't really stick with you. I mean if I fell out of the boat, would I survive? :-)

I totally did, and not only that, I had fun. Special shoutout to the friend who keeps insisting I be outdoorsy and did 90% of the rowing. He's in the pic, too. Don't you see the shadow?

One last random thought - I love how my outfit perfectly matches the kayak. That was serendipity.

Epic Storytelling

This week, Revolve Impact and the Drug Policy Alliance released "A History of the War on Drugs From Prohibition to Gold Rush." The four-minute animation features narration from Shawn Carter, AKA the hip hop businessMAN Jay-Z, and Molly Krabapple, a visual artist and advocate.

Take a look. In his casual authoritative voice, Jay-Z takes us on a drug policy journey from the Nixon years to the present with the issues surrounding the legalization of marijuana and the explosion of the prison population due largely to mandatory sentencing for drug offenses. Throughout this narrative, the film shows Krabapple illustrating the story through sketch and collage.

Upon first view, the storytelling mesmerized me. It is a fresh, inspiring take on communication - one that relies on tools that usually entertain us and gives us knowledge along with that entertainment. At the end of the day, it may even birth a more active public. I've posted the two images that resonated the most with me. The first is a comparison of the capital the aboveground marijuana economy offers the startups who rush into those communities and the drug dealer who resides in communities where marijuana is still illegal. There are definitely two different end games. One becomes/increases (legal) wealth. The other often ends up a felon, and, yes, these outcomes often pivot on race and class.

One critique from my perspective - women never appear in this story though I am sure that this economy affects us as well. Even if they have not been convicted of these offenses, they still have families who are affected for multiple generations by incarcerations. You have children who may not grow up with parents in the home, and the family is impacted economically if these households do not have multiple streams of income. In addition to this critique, Vox ran an article that says the mass incarceration story told here is "all wrong." This article relays that the prison population exploded primarily because more violent offenders were locked. I'm not sure the two categories are mutually exclusive. 

All in all, while the war on drugs may be an "epic fail." This type of storytelling is anything but. Op-eds are no longer the tried and true 800-word publications. 

Lessons From a Burlesque Dancer

When they hit me with one of the most cliched questions in DC, that's when the fun begins.

Last Friday, I had the absolute pleasure of attending a Creative Morning DC lecture featuring Gigi Holliday, a DC-based burlesque dancer. She only showed a few moves, but had plenty to teach. Gigi lives an authentic truth and is unapologetic about running her own business and taking off her clothes.

Be forewarned: These lessons are a little more graphic than usual, but that’s what you get from a real artist. Here’s her advice and insights for artists still living like 9-5 drones.

1.     Take your ass outside to play. In DC, it’s easy to get caught up in your federal or federal-related job. Gigi even had one, but when she lost it, she moved outside traditional lines.

2.     Your audience can be just as vulnerable to you. Don’t be afraid to perform or share your work. Your audience is eager for you to bring out something that’s dormant in them.

3.     Shit a strawberry on stage. Burlesque performers, whose routines can range from the glamorous to the Comic Con, can leave you with “awkward” boners. Just ask the audiences who’ve seen the climax of a Strawberry Shortcake routine.

4.     Burlesque isn’t weird. It’s innovation. Gigi, through her burlesque lessons, shows people how to live outside the traditional lines.

5.    Art, when true to yourself, can transcend to everyone. Rewards can come in surprising ways (including free dinners from husbands who are grateful that you've taught their wives new ways of moving through the world).

Create Your Way to the Top

I’ve been traveling nonstop over the past month. That includes touchdowns in Miami and Los Angeles and my first trip to Mexico, specifically Cancun. I enjoy meeting new people and seeking new adventures, so these days have been terrific.

Two of these trips have been for conferences. It was my third time at ColorComm and my first time at BlogHer. For me, these trips are personal investments. The day job doesn’t sponsor them. I do. I go because I’m curious and always trying to find and expand my path.

Miami, Los Angeles & Cancun in just one month. I'll take that!

It’s an amazing treat to be in the company of women who are confident and, well, doing thangs. Listening to their stories and achievements lights a confidence within myself, and I return to my “normal” life refreshed. An interesting thing happened at ColorComm. One of my favorite executives, Tiffany Smith-Anoa’i, EVP of diversity and inclusion at CBS, noted that she didn’t work her way to the top; she CREATED her way to the top.

This theme replicated itself at BlogHer. I was in a sea of women (yes, many mommy bloggers) who are sharing their life experiences through blogging, vlogging, podcasts, etc., and they’ve found a way to monetize their influence. Not because they are perfect, but because they share their lives pretty much just as they are. They come from a variety of backgrounds - makeup artists, law students, doctors, actors and even reality stars (Kim Kardashian), so you don’t need an expertise in shooting videos to be a vlogger.

Now, me, I have ideas. I have desire, and I even have some financial flexibility. What I struggle with is execution of this path. Let us not forget that one definition of execute is to “carry out a sentence of death.” I think my fear focuses on that definition rather than the amazing opportunities that my own creativity may offer. I like the predictable.

Luckily, in Cancun, I stepped out of my comfortable box. This was a vacation, but it was a vacation unlike others I’ve taken. I shared this trip with my 13-year-old nephews, and let’s say lying by the pool while reading a book isn’t their style. My sister scheduled an Adventure Day, and for me, this day of firsts included horseback riding, ATV driving and zip lining. While nervous, I enjoyed them all, and it was my best day of the summer despite being wet, muddy and probably stinky. I was exuberant and feasted off my endorphins. I'd like this to be my every day, and I'm not asking for perfection. I actually thrive at solving challenges. I just need a path that...OH STRIKE THAT. I'm going to CREATE a path that fits me. 

Treat Email As a Public Record

Yesterday, Democratic National Committee Chair Debbie Wasserman Schultz announced that she will resign from her position - due largely to an email leak that revealed bias against former presidential contender Bernie Sanders. This bias isn't news, but email revelations certainly make it concrete and a big fishy story as the Democrats head into their convention. In crisis communication, there are a few rules including "Mess up. Fess up. Dress up." However, at the end of the day, the organization also has to ask itself - how did we get here? 

Let's address a key portion of this scandal - the emails. Emails by nature are a record. Treat them as a public one that is privy to leaks and misdirection. For example, the recipient of your email can forward your communication to anyone, and hey, sometimes you can address the email to the wrong person (even your client or colleague that the note pertains to). My top email rules: 

1. Write emails as if they're public. I do not offer commentary on clients or colleagues, and, more importantly, I do not participate when others choose to do that. It's tempting to communicate this way when you have a team that is spread out across multiple offices, but if you need to vent or discuss a sensitive topic, pick up the phone.
2. Yes, use the phone. Most of us still have these relics or a similar VOIP system on our desks. Pick up the receiver and call someone or schedule a conference call.
3. Use your work email for work. It is not your personal email. I do not share the work address with friends and family because I do not want the communication streams to mix. 
4. When networking, share your personal email with new contacts. I am sometimes hesitant to do this, but this is the only way to ensure your personal network follows you when you transition from one position to another.
5. Never try to recall an email. In 99% of cases, that doesn't work, and if you get too antsy and send a recall, you just end up spotlighting the situation and making it worse.